My husband thinks (when brave enough to voice it) that when he gets home from work all the washing up should be done, the food should at least be starting to cook and the children should be suitably worn out. (Suitably worn out means so tired that they fall into bed come bed time but not so tired out that they become overly so, thus irritable!) He says it all with a tongue in his cheek mostly but actually, sometimes I know he means it!

He has lots of ideas really – he’s a brave man! Obviously he knows, or I think he MUST know that the things he thinks would be perfect when he walks through the door are just not possible every day or indeed most days. Occasionally I’ll have a day when I can get the washing up done and clean the whole house from top to bottom before putting a chicken in the oven so that on his arrival he has yummy cooking smells to tempt him as he sits down on the sofa, a ‘suitably tired’ child on each knee and with everyone smiling we all tell each other about our day. It’s a lovely picture isn’t it, but… those days are few and far between!

Most days I follow the children round picking up after them but as quickly as I do they make more mess than we started out with. More often than not the dirty plates pile up and the washing machine doesn’t get emptied while more and more toys are strewn around the room! ‘What was I doing?’ he will ask, ‘when all of this devastation was happening?’

Getting dressed, getting them dressed, changing a nappy or thirty five, cuddling a baby who wouldn’t STOP crying, finding things to entertain a bored child who wouldn’t STOP moaning, folding all the washing from the previous day, going to the shop, going to playgroup, taking them swimming… I don’t just sit about on my bum all day you know…

I think in an ideal world my husband, with probably lots of other brave men, would admit that he would like a women who cooked like a dream in a pristine kitchen with happy contented children reading books at her feet. He would like a woman who remembered his bedroom needs on a Friday night and maybe again on Sunday with a surprise somewhere else in the week too! He’d like one who vacuumed the whole house daily, who remembered to apply her make up and brush her hair while always being careful to choose JUST the right top to go with her skirts and yes, a bit of jewellery could probably be remembered for sure!

To be honest, I quite like the sound of this woman too but you know what? If you want that matey, you’ll have to pop back to the 1950’s because she’s not here with me in 2014! Goodness knows what went on in the fifties to ensure women had more time? I don’t know but if you watch ‘Call The Midwife’ then you’ll see they all seem to leave their babies in massive prams outside so perhaps that’s how they made up the time?

I say to Jonny that if he were home all day then it would be a different story! I’d like to see his face when I strolled in after an hour on the train reading my book to announce that the house was a mess and the children were beside themselves because he’d entertained them too much! I can imagine what he’d say to me and fruity wouldn’t come close! Well I guess we’ll never find out because I rather like my job of stay at home Mum, even if I do it very badly indeed and almost never get the hoover out!

MY LIFE WITH TWO!

We have had a funny old time with sickness bugs this past week. It has not been fun for any of us but luckily we seem to have come out the other end of it now! I’m sure there will be more bugs coming what with the weather but for now we’re looking forward to a bit of healthy time!

So we’ve spent a lot of time in the house watching TV, Swashbuckle has been on repeat and Jimmy has been playing with his garage which he calls a gadage most of the time. We have been out and about a tiny bit and Florence and I did get to go and have some fun one evening at the theatre to see Charlie and the Chocolate factory for some ‘girl’s time’, it was wonderful!

Here’s some of our highlights from the week…

Florence and I on our way to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory!

My gang!

I’ll  be back next week but in the mean time please do follow me on Twitter @rocknrollerbaby.

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