I have just realised that this is the month which marks 5 years since I have had an unbroken night’s sleep. FIVE years!

This time 5 year’s ago I got pregnant with Florence and pretty much from the start of my pregnancy I would wake up in the night at some point. I didn’t have a bad pregnancy at all, only minor things like heart burn and the odd bad back but my sleep was definitely affected and then when she came along! Oh! Well I’ve never slept again it seems! Neither of my babies like to slumber, both of them are frequently up in the night and sometimes I feel SO tired I could fall asleep where I stand!

I’ve been told that once you become a Mummy you never sleep as soundly again. I agree with that! It’s not even possible to sleep deeply when they ARE in bed because there’s a part of you always ready to be awake and be needed! I’ve also been told it gets worse and worse and worse and it’s far easier being up in the night with a crying baby knowing exactly where they are, than up in the night pacing the hallway waiting for a teenager to come home from a night out… I see that too! My Mum tells me that even now, when I have my own home and own family, she can’t sleep until she knows I am home if I have a night out! (We have the odd tipsy phone call while I walk home from the tube and she talks to me until I reach my front door!)

So I suppose I just HAVE to deal with it but it’s kind of hard sometimes… It’s REALLY hard at play groups when all the mum’s are bragging that their 6 week old baby goes through the night or that little Bobby Dazzler slept 12 hours straight from day 2 AND he’s breast fed… Cause that seems to be something people say? If you breast feed they won’t sleep and you need to top them up. Bull! I tried it in desperation and it made not a jot of difference. I think my babies just don’t need much sleep and apparently neither did I! My parents were up with me at 4.30 and I didn’t go to bed till 11 – apparently that went on until I was about 3! Guess I’m getting my pay back then!

They used sleep deprivation as a form of torture in World War 2 so I don’t think I’m being dramatic in saying that sometimes I am so cross and so wild with tiredness that I turn into a bit of a crazy! I sometimes long for a soft bed with crisp clean sheets which I can crawl into all on my own… doesn’t that sound like ecstasy! (If you’re a Mum I know it will…) But… On my one and only night away from both children when I stayed in a hotel with friends guess what? I couldn’t sleep because I missed them and needed to know if they were AWAKE?!

You can’t win with me eh!

I have decided to just try and embrace my eye bags. And stock up on concealer!

MY LIFE WITH TWO!

I haven’t updated my diary for a couple of weeks, probably because I’ve been SO tired (see above) but we’ve been having a lovely time and with the first really sunny day of the year we spent it in the park and then we even had another sunny day for more long hours playing – bring on summer!

We love playing in the park and the one close to our house is fab for climbing trees, play equipment and just running around too!

Jimmy has been talking more and more and is constantly having conversations about being in a rocket and going to the moon! In fact Jonny got him back to sleep in the early hours one morning by doing gently count downs and blast offs! He’s very funny!

They’re both playing really well together at the moment which is great fun to watch and we thought it was hilarious and had to take a picture (along with a note to probably not do it again) when Florence put Jimmy inside the tube we bought the cat to play in when he was a kitten. It was meant for a guinea pig so is very small demonstrating how dinky my boy is!

Jimmy rolled up in the guinea pig tube – I guess this is what big sisters do!

Here’s to some more sunshine and fun in the park!

I’ll  be back next week but in the mean time please do follow me on Twitter @rocknrollerbaby.

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